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Abercrombie and Fitch, why none of us should give a fuck

Last week some guy (Mike Jeffries) who owns A&F said he didn’t want fatties wearing his brand of clothing. He was like “urgh no way, I don’t want your fat being squeezed into my skinny clothes, there’s some bin bags over there, try them on for size” (he didn’t say that, but I reckon that’s what he was thinking)

Ok, well in my head all I can think is, I bet this guy is a Slytherin. I bet he loves Voldemort. (My next thought is, I bet he doesn’t even read Harry Potter… what a cock)

At this point, I should perhaps admit something. There is no way I’d fit in to an Ambercrombie and Fitch Tshirt. I doubt one of my thighs would squeeze in to a pair of their shorts, there is no thigh gap between my legs, in fact for all fashion cared my legs could just be one big thigh (so I guess a bit like a mermaid? Ariel was giving no fucks when it came to thigh gaps). So maybe I’m taking this all a bit personally?

But who told the CEO of Abercrombie and Fitch that I gave a fuck?

Why did he assume that we (fatties) would be crying over an XS tshirt in the changing rooms because some areshole who has a lot of money (and probably doesn’t read Harry Potter) told a bunch of fat teenagers he’s glad we can’t fit in to his overpriced apparel.

Because even if I was a size 4, I’m not a cool kid, I don’t fit in with his desired brand.

For example, I’m writing a blog at 3pm. Not at the beach chasing a boy and trapping him between my thigh gap.

I have a massive poster of Dobby the house elf on my wall. Not a half-naked guy beckoning my low self-esteem with his oily abs.

The next point I would like to make, is Mike Jeffries is losing a lot of business. In 2007, 74.1% of America’s population was overweight. If anything he should ditch this, and start an overweight range, like bibs so that we can catch every morsel of food that we can fit in to our fat bodies. But I guess he didn’t think of that. Now every Mcdonalds in America, will have a wanted poster for “crimes against fatties”.

So to conclude, Mike if you’re reading this, I don’t give much of a fuck. I will never buy your clothes (mainly because they don’t fit and also because you are a voldemort lover) and I hope the image my body in a size 4 t-shirt gives you nightmares.

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